2017 was a year for implementing everything I learnt in 2016. I receive a lot of compliments on the positive attitude I hold towards myself. Here are a few things I have done to get myself into a happy and comfortable place that I think many of you could find useful.
Telling yourself you are beautiful is not vain. We have become accustomed to rejecting compliments, let alone giving them to ourselves. It is okay to tell yourself that you are intelligent, caring, and beautiful, whatever it is that you need to hear. You cannot rely on hearing it from someone else and the more you actually say these things to yourself, they become your normal belief. Do not tell yourself you look gross in something, sure, you won’t look great in every outfit you put on, but next time try “This outfit doesn’t compliment my figure” not “Urg, my hips are too wide and my boobs don’t fill this out”.
It’s so hard to put the phone down when everything is online and you’re probably constantly scrolling through many social media pages where you probably follow people who are “way prettier than me”. It’s hard to cut out time on social media because we want to stay connected to friends but what you can do is control what you see. Unfollow the people you compare yourself to, don’t sit and gawk at a celebrity's bikini photo until you feel rubbish about yourself, there is literally no point.
This is hands down the best thing I have ever done for myself. When I moved house two and a half years ago the scales did not make it into my new bathroom. Religiously stepping on the scales each morning and your weight fluctuating by a pound or two can determine how you feel about yourself each day. It’s stupid and it’s not worth it. Out of sight, out of mind.
Everyone goes through their ups and downs in life, it’s normal and shouldn’t be dismissed. But toxic people are the ones who don’t care about putting you down whilst they put themselves down. These are not people you should surround yourself with and it’s okay to burn bridges. You and your wellbeing come first.
Whatever you’re insecure about, there’s probably thousands of other people feeling insecure too. I remember stretch marks being a topic of insecurity growing up. On my first trip to a lingerie trade show all the models had their zebra stripes out and were wearing them proudly. Life can be photo-shopped and it isn’t until you see these things in person that you realise we all face the same insecurities. So really we should all stop feeling insecure about them because they are so normal.
Nope, not body flaws but your actual flaws in terms of who you are as a person. Part of being confident is being able to take on constructive criticism. No one is perfect and knowing parts of yourself you want to work on will only make you better in the long run.